Into your hands I commit my spirit; redeem me, O Lord, the God of truth. - Psalm 31:5

July 25, 1998 One of my recurring problems is that I get frustrated anytime I don't see God working where I think he should. But most of the time he is working, just not in the way I expected him to. What I see as an obstacle God quite often uses as an opportunity to display his power and grace. These excerpts from my journal, all inspired by passages taken from Luke, are reflections on the unexpected ways in which God works to fulfill his purpose in my life. Joe

JOURNAL 3/24/96 John 8:49-50. While Jesus was still speaking, someone came from the house of Jairus, the synagogue ruler. "Your daughter is dead," he said. "don't bother the teacher any more." Hearing this, Jesus said to Jairus, "Don't be afraid; just believe, and she will be healed." If there ever was a time when common sense would say to stop praying, this was it. The girl was dead. It was over. The opportunity for God to work a miracle had passed. Only that's not the way Jesus saw it. I have a bad habit of praying only until a situation reaches the point of impossibility and then stopping, assuming that it must not have been God's will to intervene. Now I wonder how much I have missed by doing that. What I need to do instead is continue in prayer and in expectation until the Spirit of God either grants my request or tells me that it's time to stop praying. He is the one to determine that, not me. Just because something looks like it is finished does not meant that it really is. Even death didn't stop God from acting here, although it might have if Jairus had given up and not continued to trust in Christ. Lord, please forgive me for arrogantly deciding when to stop praying; as though I could determine which things were too hard for you! Teach me instead to depend on your Holy Spirit; to pray when you tell me to pray, and to stop only when you tell me to stop. I don't really know what I should pray for, or when, or for how long. And I won't know unless I learn to listen to you.

JOURNAL 6/10/98 Luke 1:28-31. The angel went to her and said, "Greetings, you who are highly favored! The Lord is with you." Mary was greatly troubled at his words and wondered what kind of greeting this might be. But the angel said to her, "Do not be afraid, Mary, you have found favor with God. You will be with child and give birth to a son, and you are to give him the name Jesus." Luke 1:41-49. When Elizabeth heard Mary's greeting, the baby leaped in her womb, and Elizabeth was filled with the Holy Spirit. In a loud voice she exclaimed: "Blessed are you among women, and blessed is the child you will bear! But why am I so favored, that the mother of my Lord should come to me? As soon as the sound of your greeting reached my ears, the baby in my womb leaped for joy. Blessed is she who has believed that what the Lord has said to her will be accomplished!" And Mary said: "My soul praises the Lord and my spirit rejoices in God my Savior, for he has been mindful of the humble state of his servant. From now on all generations will call me blessed, for the Mighty One has done great things for me -- holy is his name." The angel, Elizabeth, and Mary herself all believe that Mary has been blessed by God. Why? In what sense is this a blessing? The angel has announced that she will have a baby. She gets to experience all the discomfort of pregnancy, as well as all the pain and danger of childbirth. Furthermore, she's not married. How many people does she think are going to buy her story about angels and miracles? Worst of all, what will Joseph think when he finds out she's pregnant? He knows he's not the father after all. No, this doesn't strike me as much of a blessing. In fact, it could really be considered a blessing for everyone except Mary. Everyone else gets the benefit, she gets all the hardship. And this isn't an isolated case in Scripture! Joseph, Moses, the prophets: In the majority of cases when God promises to bless someone it turns out to be mainly a blessing for everyone else. The person to whom it was promised mainly gets nothing but hardship instead. That and the knowledge that their suffering has in some way been of benefit to others. And primarily others who don't deserve it. Hoorah. But if this is profoundly uncomforting, at least it helps me keep in perspective the promises God has give me. Yes, they are a blessing, but not primarily for my benefit. God desires to bless others through me. But it is also significant to see the way in which God's promises are fulfilled. Very often in Scripture an impasse is reached. A point where it is clear to everyone that the promise has failed. For Abraham it was when he was told to offer Isaac as a sacrifice. For Joseph, when he was sold into slavery. For Moses, when God led Israel into a dead end between Pharaoh's army and the ocean. And most clearly, the impasse came for Jesus when he was executed as a common criminal. In each case though, not only did the impasse not stop God's promise, it became the very means by which that promise was fulfilled.

JOURNAL 7/17/98 Luke 1:21-24,. On the eighth day, when it was time to circumcise him, he was named Jesus, the name the angel had given him before he had been conceived. When the time of their purification according to the Law of Moses had been completed, Joseph and Mary took him to Jerusalem to present him to the Lord (as it is written in the Law of the Lord, "Every firstborn male is to be consecrated to the Lord"), and to offer a sacrifice in keeping with what is said in the Law of the Lord: "a pair of doves, or two young pigeons." Joseph and Mary had no idea what was going to happen to them at the temple. God met them while they were being obedient. But it wasn't because they were being obedient! If that had been the reason, then every person who went up to the temple to obey this command could expect to receive a prophetic message from God. But God, in grace, chose whom he wanted to receive this message. Nor did it start with Mary and Joseph's obedience. It began when God sent an angel to Mary, and a dream to Joseph. Their obedience was a response to God's grace, and it brought them into the right place at the right time to receive an even greater measure of grace. There are two equal but opposite errors to be avoided here. Two ways I can miss God's grace. I can miss it by looking only at my obedience, as though that were the coin with which I could earn God's favor. If I do that I exchange grace for law, and miss the freedom God longs for me to have. The other error is to take God's favor for granted, forgetting that my obedience is the proper and necessary response to his grace. This way I turn God's mercy into a license to sin. The Christian life is both a life flooded with God's grace, and a life lived in humble obedience. Each is incomplete without the other. Father, make me more deeply aware of your grace, which you have poured out on your own initiative. And may it be that I see your blessings for what they are, and respond with an obedience to your word and your commands, born out of gratitude for all you have done.

JOURNAL 7/20/98 Luke 1:39-40. When Joseph and Mary had done everything required by the Law of the Lord, they returned to Galilee to their own town of Nazareth. And the child grew and became strong; he was filled with wisdom, and the grace of God was upon him. For twelve years nothing really happened. Jesus lived a normal life, like anyone else. All of the prophecies seemed to have been put on hold. And yet God was doing a great deal. He was working inwardly, in the hidden places where no one could see. He was preparing for the time to come, when his work would be revealed publicly in Jesus. The revelation was quick, but the preparation was slow and mostly invisible. God's grace was upon Jesus, filling him with wisdom and giving him strength, even though no one could see it yet. God does his work in the secret places. When it looks as though my life is on hold; when nothing much is happening; when day in and day out nothing changes or seems to get better; that is when God is doing his work in me. Like the seeds in the parables of later chapters don't become visible until they have been growing and becoming rooted for many days or even weeks, so it is with the changes God brings about in my life. They grow gradually and in secret, until one day they spring upon the world fully grown and visible at last. Lord, I praise you that you hide your work from the world, yet you show yourself to little children like me. Please keep my eyes open and help me to see even more clearly what you are about as you do your work in the hidden places. And in the times when I can't see anything at all happening, please help me to remember how you work, and trust that your promises have not been forgotten. © 1998, Joe Jefferson. All rights reserved. Permission is hereby granted to make copies for ministry purposes, provided no fee is charged and this copyright notice is included.